


Sergeant Angua's Curse

by Veul_McLannon



Category: Discworld - Terry Pratchett
Genre: Established Relationship, Humorous in intent if not in actuality, M/M, POV Third Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-17 00:06:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14821491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veul_McLannon/pseuds/Veul_McLannon
Summary: In the process of an investigation, Commander Sir Samuel Vimes has seen fit to order the searching of all rooms on the third floor of the Palace. This includes the room of the Patrician, Lord Havelock Vetinari. Commander Sir Samuel Vimes has lumped Sergeant Angua von Uberwald with sniffing out the incriminating evidence. She makes a discovery, but not the one she had planned to.





	Sergeant Angua's Curse

Angua shifted awkwardly, waiting outside the Oblong Office with Commander Vimes. There had been no need for her to tell him; he probably would have expired from shock (and, she admitted privately to herself, unnecessary histrionics) on the spot.  As it was, she’d never be able to look either man in the face again; awareness of people’s private lives without their acknowledgment was often perceived somewhat negatively. Thankfully for her it was rare enough that she visited the Palace in a formal capacity.

When they were admitted, everything was as she would expect; Vetinari sitting calmly behind his desk, fingers steepled; his clerk across the room, intently scribbling something onto a ream of fresh paper. Perfectly normal – except for the fact that she could smell the clerk turning scarlet from across the room, a citrus tang permeating the air. But it wasn’t quite strong enough to mask the original scent of its habitual occupants. Which was, curiously enough, identical to that in Vetinari’s chambers when she had searched them earlier (the Patrician being inclined to allow unnecessary intrusions into his personal effects when such actions might lead to the apprehension of a dangerous serial mime).

She didn’t hear a word Commander Vimes said, gaze fixed as it was about a foot above Vetinari’s head and to the left, this being a much safer place to look than to allow her gaze (and thoughts) to wander naturally. She only came to when she heard her name, and had to apologise for lapsing, blaming the aftereffects of repeated Changing. She heard Drumknott stop writing in the background and become distractingly still as she gave her report, which was concise and required not even the briefest removal of her gaze from the infinitely intriguing wall.

In the end, the gist of the report was that there was nothing to report. Vetinari had been curiously relaxed about the whole affair; they left without Vimes even contemplating a bout of wall-thumping.

“Well, Sergeant, on to the next lead, then,” Vimes said, reapplying his helmet. “A shame your nose didn’t pick up the trail.”

“Yes sir,” she replied, trailing after him helplessly.

 _The Patrician... and his_ clerk _?!_ She was going to need to take a very long walk indeed.

***

Within the Oblong Office, Vetinari was smiling. “Well, I think that went quite as well as can be expected.” Receiving no response, he continued, “Did you see she has mastered the Vimesian art of wall-staring? Truly admirable in one so young.”

Drumknott, his head buried in his hands, just groaned.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I'm not overly chuffed with this, but I liked the concept enough to try and write it... comments as usual greatly appreciated :)


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